I think the cruelest part is that deep down we know all of this already - we just bury it as deep as we can. And I’ve found that most of the work in becoming myself is digging myself out of the hole I’ve dug. Mostly through journaling, meditation, and being around friends.
Absolutely, I agree - on some level, we do tend to know we've done this to ourselves. That also means we can undo it. Like you, I'm doing that now ... journaling, meditation, friends - pets, gardens, writing on Substack and laying myself out there ... :) ... whatever satisfies our true selves.
This is beautiful! and YES YES YES - fear holds us back. It's true, when we allow ourselves to be fully who we are some people and experiences will fall away, but that will because we have aligned with our true selves. When we are aligned, we draw in more of what resonates - what suits us and brings us joy.
When we are brave enough to move past the fear, we create our best experiences. Thank you so much for sharing this lovely piece.
Thank you for your reflection. Bringing it to the light, all of us, somehow gives permission to others to find their bravery. What could this world be like if we all embraced our uniqueness?
Several keys are: to like yourself, lower your expectations and be in the moment, always learning and seeing what is in front of you. I wish you great success with your book;
The need to “improve” ourselves, I believe, stems from our attachment to a certain outcome — a career, a person, a reputation, a story, a future, a possibility that having that outcome would make us happy. Camus says “Man is the only creature who refuses to be what he is.” Well…maybe it’s because human is the only creature that valued “happiness” over authenticity. The result of this misunderstanding is that we ended up having neither.
I have no judgment that this is sad. I'm glad it resonates because it means you have an awareness that you are now at choice to do something about. Is it time to evolve? I'll say it again - When we stop resisting who we are, when we stop apologizing for our differences and instead lean into them, we step into our fullest power. I say shine on Brenda! 💖
Scott, this piece really resonates with me. I am my most authentic self when I give myself extended times of solitude deep in a forest. I live at the base of Pikes Peak and have unlimited access to beautiful forests for which I am ever grateful. Thank you for writing this and sharing it. I have read two of your books, Wilderness: The Gateway To The Soul and Nature's Silent Message. Both are wonderful. I am looking forward to your new book when it is ready.
Awesome - so glad you're excited about the new book coming out. I can't wait for you to read it...sounds like it will also deeply resonate based on what you've shared about yourself here. And lucky you to live in such a grand landscape. I harbor the same gratitude for my life tucked in the Colorado San Juans. 💚
I love the San Juan’s…their ruggedness and sheer beauty. I get down there when I can. I was lucky to have grown up in Crested Butte in the early 1970’s. So few people and not much commercial stuff. I was that kid who was always outside no matter what time of year it was. Thank you again and happy writing! Your writing makes a difference in the lives of many!
Simply Awesome Scott! I just finished reading I don’t want to grow up. I loved it even though I am retired in my 60s.
My wife and I sold everything except the cat and moved to the PNW 2 years ago. At the speed things are changing, this could be a really helpful book for people who are finding it’s time for a change.
Did you know that Birch trees in your picture according to the Celtic Tree Ogham signifies new beginnings? They do. 😀
If you didn’t know this, I am thinking you just got a wink from Nature.
I love this - thank you. That book was originally written for young people who feel like I did at that age. I wanted them to know they're not alone and there is another way. And recently, I Don't Want To Grow Up seems to be finding its way to older generations too. I'm certain it's not by mistake. Thanks for validating that there are takeaways for every age group. Happy wanderings.
I love this and have been trying to live it. In fact, I've stricken "nobody's perfect" from my vocabulary because I just don't believe that perfection should be a thing.
I grew up in the religion of Mormonism which is obsessively perfectionist. When I left the Mormon church, I did a lot of deconstructing/reconstructing. In that process, I read the Bhagavad Gita, The Yoga Sutras, the Tao te Ching, among other things. I found it fascinating that there could be major religions that were not built on the idea of "original sin."
I don't actually believe in any one religion, but the reframing was affirming and life-changing.
Anyway, excellent post. Excited to check out your books!
This has been on my mind alot—the struggle between authenticity and belonging. You’re right, fear of rejection is strong, but you want to know something even more terrifying? Not being, or even knowing, yourself. Imagine at the end of life you say, “I lived, but I was never me.” Terrifying. On the flip side, being your full self usually involves standing out and getting rejected. But, this seems to be the key behind personal power and long term happiness.
I understand. For me the cost of not being myself was no longer something I was willing to sacrifice. I was willing for it all to fall away, to let it all go at the expense of coming Home to me. And slowly I built something genuine. Authenticity found me. Belonging found me. It was no longer an "either/or"...both things are possible.
As much as I love your work and your posts about gorgeous sunsets and meadows, a little friendly reminder would be to ditch the em dashes since they wreak of ChatGPT 😝 (And I say this as someone who has exactly the same problem, so I ain’t judging!) (If you don’t use ChatGPT to write these then I apologize but I have been ruined by this easy tech.)
I appreciate your concern...and I love the em dash....I'm keeping it. 😆 I started using it in my first book Wilderness The Gateway To The Soul (7 years ago) and have in the 6 books I've written since...and will again in my new book coming out this summer. I can assure you, ChatGPT is not writing my posts. I'm not sure what the point would be if it did. 🤷♂️So again, thanks for the friendly reminder...and I'm not ditching the em dash.
I think the cruelest part is that deep down we know all of this already - we just bury it as deep as we can. And I’ve found that most of the work in becoming myself is digging myself out of the hole I’ve dug. Mostly through journaling, meditation, and being around friends.
Absolutely, I agree - on some level, we do tend to know we've done this to ourselves. That also means we can undo it. Like you, I'm doing that now ... journaling, meditation, friends - pets, gardens, writing on Substack and laying myself out there ... :) ... whatever satisfies our true selves.
This is beautiful! and YES YES YES - fear holds us back. It's true, when we allow ourselves to be fully who we are some people and experiences will fall away, but that will because we have aligned with our true selves. When we are aligned, we draw in more of what resonates - what suits us and brings us joy.
When we are brave enough to move past the fear, we create our best experiences. Thank you so much for sharing this lovely piece.
Thank you for your reflection. Bringing it to the light, all of us, somehow gives permission to others to find their bravery. What could this world be like if we all embraced our uniqueness?
Hi Scott, I like what you write.
I live what you write.
It took a long time to become who I am today.
Several keys are: to like yourself, lower your expectations and be in the moment, always learning and seeing what is in front of you. I wish you great success with your book;
it sounds like what a lot of people need.
I'm glad our paths have crossed here. 💖 Thank you for your kind words, it means a lot to me.
The need to “improve” ourselves, I believe, stems from our attachment to a certain outcome — a career, a person, a reputation, a story, a future, a possibility that having that outcome would make us happy. Camus says “Man is the only creature who refuses to be what he is.” Well…maybe it’s because human is the only creature that valued “happiness” over authenticity. The result of this misunderstanding is that we ended up having neither.
This so resonated with me. It was as though you described how I am. Sad hey😊
I have no judgment that this is sad. I'm glad it resonates because it means you have an awareness that you are now at choice to do something about. Is it time to evolve? I'll say it again - When we stop resisting who we are, when we stop apologizing for our differences and instead lean into them, we step into our fullest power. I say shine on Brenda! 💖
Thanks for the encouragement 😊
Scott, this piece really resonates with me. I am my most authentic self when I give myself extended times of solitude deep in a forest. I live at the base of Pikes Peak and have unlimited access to beautiful forests for which I am ever grateful. Thank you for writing this and sharing it. I have read two of your books, Wilderness: The Gateway To The Soul and Nature's Silent Message. Both are wonderful. I am looking forward to your new book when it is ready.
Awesome - so glad you're excited about the new book coming out. I can't wait for you to read it...sounds like it will also deeply resonate based on what you've shared about yourself here. And lucky you to live in such a grand landscape. I harbor the same gratitude for my life tucked in the Colorado San Juans. 💚
I love the San Juan’s…their ruggedness and sheer beauty. I get down there when I can. I was lucky to have grown up in Crested Butte in the early 1970’s. So few people and not much commercial stuff. I was that kid who was always outside no matter what time of year it was. Thank you again and happy writing! Your writing makes a difference in the lives of many!
Wow - Crested Butte in the ‘70’s…I can only imagine! And thank you for your very kind words. 😍
Simply Awesome Scott! I just finished reading I don’t want to grow up. I loved it even though I am retired in my 60s.
My wife and I sold everything except the cat and moved to the PNW 2 years ago. At the speed things are changing, this could be a really helpful book for people who are finding it’s time for a change.
Did you know that Birch trees in your picture according to the Celtic Tree Ogham signifies new beginnings? They do. 😀
If you didn’t know this, I am thinking you just got a wink from Nature.
I love this - thank you. That book was originally written for young people who feel like I did at that age. I wanted them to know they're not alone and there is another way. And recently, I Don't Want To Grow Up seems to be finding its way to older generations too. I'm certain it's not by mistake. Thanks for validating that there are takeaways for every age group. Happy wanderings.
You might really like this woman’s message. The word is getting out.
https://substack.com/@avaphoenix/note/c-126465314?r=4lqjfm&utm_medium=ios&utm_source=notes-share-action
Much needed read this afternoon...thank you!
When all about you seem to be having and rushing and jolly,, and you are just feeling rotten....please read Scott ...it helps me...regards Keith.
Brilliant....
Thank you. 💚
I love this and have been trying to live it. In fact, I've stricken "nobody's perfect" from my vocabulary because I just don't believe that perfection should be a thing.
I grew up in the religion of Mormonism which is obsessively perfectionist. When I left the Mormon church, I did a lot of deconstructing/reconstructing. In that process, I read the Bhagavad Gita, The Yoga Sutras, the Tao te Ching, among other things. I found it fascinating that there could be major religions that were not built on the idea of "original sin."
I don't actually believe in any one religion, but the reframing was affirming and life-changing.
Anyway, excellent post. Excited to check out your books!
Thank you for your candid and kind words here. I'm glad you've uncovered your true self and now feel free to let You shine. 💖
You're inspiring to me Bru
The trail through the Aspen forest photo is amazing, as is the path of life it represents.
This has been on my mind alot—the struggle between authenticity and belonging. You’re right, fear of rejection is strong, but you want to know something even more terrifying? Not being, or even knowing, yourself. Imagine at the end of life you say, “I lived, but I was never me.” Terrifying. On the flip side, being your full self usually involves standing out and getting rejected. But, this seems to be the key behind personal power and long term happiness.
I understand. For me the cost of not being myself was no longer something I was willing to sacrifice. I was willing for it all to fall away, to let it all go at the expense of coming Home to me. And slowly I built something genuine. Authenticity found me. Belonging found me. It was no longer an "either/or"...both things are possible.
As much as I love your work and your posts about gorgeous sunsets and meadows, a little friendly reminder would be to ditch the em dashes since they wreak of ChatGPT 😝 (And I say this as someone who has exactly the same problem, so I ain’t judging!) (If you don’t use ChatGPT to write these then I apologize but I have been ruined by this easy tech.)
I appreciate your concern...and I love the em dash....I'm keeping it. 😆 I started using it in my first book Wilderness The Gateway To The Soul (7 years ago) and have in the 6 books I've written since...and will again in my new book coming out this summer. I can assure you, ChatGPT is not writing my posts. I'm not sure what the point would be if it did. 🤷♂️So again, thanks for the friendly reminder...and I'm not ditching the em dash.
Lovely! Apologies for the misunderstanding then! :)
No worries. 😊